Beauty in an ADHD relationship

Relationships with ADHD can be hard. Poor working memory can result in forgotten commitments. In a joint household, mundane daily tasks can get neglected. But don’t forget to find the beauty in an ADHD relationship.

Good in a crisis

My ADHD husband may struggle to consistently perform mundane tasks like doing the dishes. When I work a run of graveyards, I get frustrated about the household tasks that get left undone. For real solutions for real challenges like this, check back soon for a post on time management.

However, when there was a crisis with our dog escaping and getting hit by a car when I was tired post shift, he jumped into action. He was able to quickly think through and make the appropriate phone calls. He quickly tracked down animal control, and subsequently the location of our dog. Next, he called the vet that she had been taken to while we were on our way. Check out my post here about benefits of dogs in an ADHD household.

All of those “right now” tasks can be processed quickly. The sense of urgency produces laser focus. Despite difficulties with emotional regulation day to day, in crisis circumstances, action takes forefront. Since the tasks are in the ”now”, they aren’t bogged down by all of the other things that need done. Everything in a crisis is processed ”now”.

Generous with their time

Once again, with the mundane tasks, time may be spent elsewhere. However, if someone is in need, the ADHD people in my life are often the first to jump in to offer help. A friend was worried about how she looked to someone in charge of one of her kids activities. The mundane tasks such as signing permission slips, paying the random activity fee, etc. sometimes get missed.

However, if a friend calls needing a ride to urgent care, she’s right there. If someone is feeling suicidal, she’ll drop everything to make sure they’ll be okay. When someone’s real about struggles with drugs or mental health, she’ll be beyond supporting. Many people, despite caring about people, don’t give as fully of their time. Society needs the people with ADHD that will give fully in times of need!

Think outside the box

I have seen this gift squashed with rejection sensitivity dysphoria. Check out this article about positive parenting here, to help decrease effects of this. Repeated failures when poor impulse control allows creativity to go awry. However, when fear doesn’t get in the way, people with ADHD can be amazing problem solvers. The creativity of so many ADHD people in my life amazes me. When given the proper encouragement, they can be amazing at creating works of art, or solving problems that stump everyone else.

Support the natural beauty

If you love someone in your life with ADHD, learn more about how their brain works. Appreciate their natural beauty. Support them to be their best.

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The content in this post is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.  It is merely opinion based on personal research and experience.

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